Knight Life
by chille-tiid
Summary: Riza was hoping for a peaceful night alone, but she's stuck playing knight in shining armor. A Roy/Riza oneshot


**Author's note: It's been a while since I've written about these two. And it's not much, but I thought it was a cute idea. Anyway, enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist (original or Brotherhood) or any of its characters**

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The bar was nearly empty now. A rowdy group of twenty-somethings had just left, leaving the rest of the patrons in their preferred silence. Riza had watched them leave, secretly wondering if that would have been her had she not met the Colonel. She sipped on her whiskey.

"Interesting choice of drink," a voice said, accompanied by a plume of smoke. Riza nearly groaned, not wanting to turn toward the voice. "I wouldn't have taken you for a whiskey drinker."

"Since when do you smoke, Colonel?" she responded, taking another sip. She did look at him then. Roy Mustang sat with his back against the bar; elbows on the counter, cigarette in hand. His head lolled casually on his shoulder, his eyes on her face. He shrugged.

"I do it on occasion," he replied. Riza rolled her eyes. For one night she didn't want to have to focus on her superior. But this was a bar, and alcohol was present, and the Colonel was always extra needy and irresponsible when he was drunk. It was time to play babysitter. She downed the rest of her drink.

"How long have you been here?" she asked. The Colonel took a long drag of his cigarette.

"Not longer than you. I saw you when I came in." He turned his face toward the ceiling and let out a cloud of smoke. "That's the only drink you've had." Riza truly wanted nothing more than to stomp out the cigarette and give him a hard slap.

"How observant of you." She restrained herself from mentioning anything about spying or stalking. In his drunken state of mind, Roy found her sarcasm amusing and he chortled. She groaned in response.

"And just how much have _you_ had to drink?" Riza asked, pinching the bridge of her nose. She felt a headache coming on but it wasn't because of the alcohol. The Colonel's attempts to blow smoke rings failed but he smiled anyway.

"Dunno." He tilted his head towards the booths. "Table's over there." A table with a half eaten plate of food and a nearly empty bottle of vodka. There was a little pile of money on the table as well. At least I won't have to pay this time, she thought. Roy took one last puff of the cigarette before throwing it down and crushing it with his heel. He hopped off the bar stool, swaying slightly.

"I, personally, could go for more but you look like you're ready to leave." He gave her a crooked grin and laughed at the glare she gave him in return. Heaving a sigh and dropping money on the counter Riza stood up. She followed him as he went to the door and struggled to open it.

"Push, sir." Roy stopped pulling at the handle and instead went for a push. To his drunken delight, it opened. He shot her a lopsided grin. He pushed it open all the way and stepped out into the cool night air. Riza followed suit while her superior stretched his arms behind his head.

"So how 'bout I walk you home?" he asked.

"I think it'll be the other way around, sir," she replied stonily. He shrugged.

"Suit yourself." The Colonel turned and began walking in the direction of his home. A little ways ahead of him was the rambunctious group of young people that had left the bar just minutes before them. As he got closer, Roy acknowledged the large group. The young men saluted him back and, in their own drunken stupor, turned their gazes to Riza who was following close behind her superior.

"Well heeeeyyy there, hot stuff," one of them warbled.

"Where you headed, beautiful?" another piped in. Several other comments, all just as vomit-inducing, rang among the group. Riza rolled her eyes but was able to ignore them. The Colonel, however, stopped abruptly and glared at the large group. They paid him no mind, continuing on with their raucous antics. Drunken with confidence, among other things, Roy approached the rowdiest – and largest – of the men.

"You catcalling my Lieutenant?" Roy accused, poking the man in chest. Colonel Mustang was already a very tall man; nearly a head taller than Riza. The man he decided to interrogate, however, was even taller than Roy. And much larger in general.

"Wha'd you say ta me?" The man loomed over Roy, forcing him to tilt his head up to look him in the eye.

"You heard me, you giant oaf," Roy insulted. "You and your boys are harassing my woman and I won't stand for it." Both Riza and the large man were becoming more infuriated with the Colonel by the second. The other men circled around Roy and their friend, muttering amongst themselves. The large man tensed up and flicked his eyes over to Riza.

"You his woman?" he asked in a deep, booming voice.

"Not at all," she replied, crossing her arms. Roy, who had been puffing out his chest to seem more threatening, deflated.

"Lieutenant!" he cried, seeming offended. The large man returned his gaze to the Colonel.

"Well she ain't your woman and I wasn't harassing her," he grumbled. Roy could not think of a comeback, so he did the only thing that made logical sense: he clenched his hand, reared it back, and swung for the man's jaw. Unfortunately for Roy, his fist collided with a face that was unfazed by the forceful contact.

"Get 'im Ged!" someone from the crowd shouted. The large man – Ged as it would be – didn't need encouragement to knock Roy in the cheekbone. The Colonel lost his balance and fell to the ground. Ged made to bend over and throw a few more hits, as did several other members of the group. Riza released a sigh of frustration. If it had been just talk she wouldn't have had to intervene. But with Roy on the ground and a very large group of drunk men much younger than him aiming to teach him a lesson, the Lieutenant figured she'd better stop things before they went too far. In the blink of an eye, Riza had bent down to the gun strapped at her calf and pulled it from its holster. She pointed it at the men with no intention to use it as anything other than a scare tactic. Their rowdiness stopped immediately after the first one saw the gun and shouted.

"Let's get out of here!" With those words, the crowd dissipated as the men scattered in all directions. Riza nudged the grounded Colonel with her foot. Upon noticing their hasty retreat, his face lit up.

"Ha!" Roy hollered. The still very drunk man leapt up triumphantly, almost falling backwards from the lack of balance. "Suckers!"

"Don't push your luck, sir," Riza stated, considering pointing it at him as well. But the Colonel either didn't hear her or chose to ignore her words. As she put the gun back in its holster Roy danced around in victory, humming something made-up. Without the presence of more drunken men, Riza felt less irritated with the Colonel. She still wanted to get him home as fast as possible, though.

"I think you've had enough excitement for one night, sir," she decided to say. Roy tripped over his own feet and stumbled forward, but managed to stay upright.

"I don't feel sa hot," the Colonel slurred, starting to sway. His hand flew to his face, his cheek starting to swell where he'd been hit. Riza pursed her lips but nevertheless grabbed his free arm and swung it over her shoulder. Her other hand wrapped around his back for added support. The Colonel leaned heavily on her.

"Let's get you home." They walked slowly in silence. This wasn't the first time she'd had to care for an intoxicated Roy Mustang, but it certainly was the first time he had almost gotten himself into serious trouble. Though she supposed he meant well.

"I guess I should thank you for sticking up for me," she said. Roy lolled his head to the side to look at her. "Though I think we both know I could have handled it on my own," she added. He smirked.

"Well _I_ think we both know I'm the only one who gets to call you things like 'beautiful' and 'hot stuff' so it was the only logical thing to do," the Colonel teased. Riza felt her cheeks grow hot. She shoved her superior's arm off of her and let him stumble away. Her attempt to speed ahead of him faltered as he managed to catch onto her hand. Fortunately they were approaching his home so she took the opportunity to drag him to the door. For a few moments they did nothing; Roy held onto Riza's hand and she let him. It just was as awkward as it was satisfying. At last the man sighed.

"And thank you to you too, for saving me." All discomfiture subsided and she nearly laughed at the sloppy grin he shot her. Still, Roy continued to hold Riza's hand. Rather suddenly and deliberately, he pulled it up to his face and pressed his lips against the back. Her eyes widened, cheeks reddening.

"My knight in shining armor," he mused against her hand. Roy glanced up to meet her gaze. He was able to hold it for a few moments before she looked away embarrassed. Yet still she hadn't pulled her hand away. He fought the urge to nuzzle his face against her hand. Somehow his drunken mind had found the restraint and he released her hand. It fell gently to her side.

"Goodnight then, sir," Riza interrupted the quiet. The Colonel winked and entered his home, shutting the door behind him.

"See you at work, hot stuff." The Colonel's voice came muffled but loud from behind the door. Riza rolled her eyes but couldn't stop the smile from gracing her lips.

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 **Thanks for reading! Reviews are always appreciated so please do so :)**


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